How did this happen? What am I going to do? What are my options?
These are just a few of the many questions that women facing an unplanned pregnancy will ask themselves.
But what about adoption?
While you might be overwhelmed by the multitude of emotions you’re experiencing, it’s important to think about the future.
Here are four common concerns about adoption that you may be feeling. Think about them, internalize them and consider what your next step is going to be.
1. Adoption, Abortion or Parenting?
“Am I prepared for this?”
If this was the first question you asked yourself, then you’re not alone. Most women experiencing an unplanned pregnancy wonder if they are at the right point in their life to raise a child, or if they should instead consider adoption or abortion.
If adoption or abortion are your two best options, rather than parenting, it would be wise to do as much research about each as possible. Birth Mother Baskets can help you find appropriate adoption professionals, doctors and pregnancy centers to help you decide what is the best for you and your baby.
2. How Do I Explain This To My Loved Ones?
Women experiencing an unplanned pregnancy often worry about what they are going to tell their parents, grandparents, siblings, friends, and peers. The same goes for the decision they make about the pregnancy. If they decide to pursue adoption or abortion, then their thoughts may turn toward what loved ones may think about that choice.
Naturally, wondering about other’s perceptions will dominate a woman’s thoughts during this already difficult time. Instead of dwelling about what others should think, women facing an unplanned pregnancy should be focusing on what is best for her and her baby.
While these thoughts about friends and family are natural and totally necessary, it’s important to remember that this decision is about YOU and YOUR child. It’s okay to seek advice, but this is your decision to make.
3. Thinking About Adoption and Your Child
“What happens to my child when I place them for adoption? Will they “hate” me for it? Will I ever see them again?”
It’s not uncommon for women facing an unplanned pregnancy to think these thoughts regarding adoption. In fact, it’s quite common! But adoption is much different today than it was many years ago.
In the past, adoptions were mostly closed. This means there was no contact between an adopted child and their birth parents, and oftentimes the child had little or no information about his or her background. Closed adoptions often lead to frustration and place large void in a child’s life.
These days, adoptions are much more open. Adoption agencies and organizations encourage adoptive families to be open and honest with the child from a very young age. Open adoption allows for children to know their history, learn about their birth parents and better understand their background.
When considering placing a child for adoption, it’s best to understand that while this decision is very difficult for you, your child will still have a happy childhood and will be deeply appreciative of your decision.
4. Thinking About Adoption and Your Future
So you’ve thought about adoption. You’ve considered your family, your child and everything else. Now, it’s time to think about yourself and what this decision will mean for your future.
While negative adoption stories tend to get more attention by the media, it’s important to remember that 99% of adoptions are a completely positive experience for everyone involved. Many birth mothers say that their decision to place their child was a positive turning point in their lives. Some were able to finish school, others were able to advance their career. Some were able to get married before starting a family and others were able to provide more care to their current children, who needed them desperately.
If you truly feel that you cannot raise this child on your own, then adoption may be the best decision.
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